Hooray, the Apprentice found my car keys so you can all stop looking now. They were in my very messy kitchen behind the bread machine. I knew that bread machine was a mistake. It does make beautiful bread but makes me very fat. I cannot go to the gym because I have to wait for my bread. Then of course I have to eat the bread. Well, be grateful the keys weren't actually inside the bread. Time to clean the kitchen but I thought if I left it long enough someone else would do it.... fat chance. They just moan whilst making loads of crumbs cutting their wonky bread slices.
This new diet that Mr Smith has me on ... the 2:5 diet .... isn't going all that well. I have gained 2lbs so far. I am absolutely brilliant at the five days of eating whatever you like but the two very low calorie days aren't nearly such fun. I tried a "fast day" on Thursday but Claudia gave me the most divine Greek biscuits to eat then it sort of went downhill gradually. It's all her fault. I tried again yesterday which was much better although I vastly exceeded the 500 calorie allowance. I shall just pretend I didn't. It's normal eating now til Monday when I have another starvation day. I am going to the market to get loads of veg to make a low cal soup that will sustain me on low cal days. I will try to find a stall that sells cheap willpower. Mr Smith declares me unsuited to fasting. He is probably right.
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